BP wins innovator of the year award

BP was presented the coveted "Best Innovation in OIL price gouging" award for inventing a new way to jack oil prices in the global market. BP recently announced that it was shutting down oil pipelines after it found major corrosion in a stretch of the pipeline.

Speaking at the glittering award ceremony, US Vice President, Dick Cheney, said that the private companies should do more, and rely less on the government in jacking up gas prices. Cheney said, "There are only so many wars that a Government can fight. We have milked Iran's 'alleged' nuclear program to give a major boost to the gas prices, we have made sure the rebels in African nations maintain a constant upward trend in the gas prices, but at some point, the private sector should pitch in".

OPEC Chairman praised BP for its innovation, in his address during the ceremony the chairman said, "Oil will help in fostering the world peace. It is laudable that a company managed by infidels helps Islamic nations reap profits from the hiked prices of Oil".

The other contenders for the award was the British Government that tacitly issued a terror advisory indicating more terrorist attacks using shiny flying machines. However it did not win the coveted award on two accounts. Firstly it failed to push up the gas prices to any significant amount. And, secondly because government agencies on the payroll of the OPEC are barred from participating.